As I suspected, you are having throughput problems on your disk. Here's what I looked at to give you background. The nodetool tpstats
output from your three nodes had these lines:
Pool Name Active Pending Completed Blocked All time blocked
FlushWriter 0 0 22 0 8
FlushWriter 0 0 80 0 6
FlushWriter 0 0 38 0 9
The column I'm concerned about is the All Time Blocked. As a ratio to completed, you have a lot of blocking. The flushwriter is responsible for flushing memtables to the disk to keep the JVM from running out of memory or creating massive GC problems. The memtable is an in-memory representation of your tables. As your nodes take more writes, they start to fill and need to be flushed. That operation is a long sequential write to disk. Bookmark that. I'll come back to it.
When flushwriters are blocked, the heap starts to fill. If they stay blocked, you will see the requests starting to queue up and eventually the node will OOM.
Compaction might be running as well. Compaction is a long sequential read of SSTables into memory and then a long sequential flush of the merge sorted results. More sequential IO.
So all these operations on disk are sequential. Not random IOPs. If your disk is not able to handle simultaneous sequential read and write, IOWait shoots up, requests get blocked and then Cassandra has a really bad day.
You mentioned you are using Ceph. I haven't seen a successful deployment of Cassandra on Ceph yet. It will hold up for a while and then tip over on sequential load. Your easiest solution in the short term is to add more nodes to spread out the load. The medium term is to find some ways to optimize your stack for sequential disk loads, but that will eventually fail. Long term is get your data on real disks and off shared storage.
I have told this to consulting clients for years when using Cassandra "If your storage has an ethernet plug, you are doing it wrong" Good rule of thumb.