I am also facing issue on my setup ( 1.19)
[root@project1kubemaster ~]# kubectl version --short
Client Version: v1.19.3
Server Version: v1.19.3
[root@project1kubemaster ~]# ps -ef | grep kube-proxy
root 2103 2046 0 11:30 ? 00:00:00 /usr/local/bin/kube-proxy --config=/var/lib/kube-proxy/config.conf --hostname-override=project1kubemaster
[root@project1kubemaster ~]# ll /var/lib/kube-proxy/config.conf
ls: cannot access /var/lib/kube-proxy/config.conf: No such file or directory
One more interesting thing is "kube-proxy" is also not found :
[root@project1kubemaster ~]# ls /usr/local/bin/kube-proxy
ls: cannot access /usr/local/bin/kube-proxy: No such file or directory
Above made me realize that kube-proxy binary is running inside kubeproxy container of that node
[root@project1kubemaster ~]# kubectl get pods -n kube-system -o wide | grep proxy
kube-proxy-ffbqr 1/1 Running 0 27m <IP> project1kubeworker2 <none> <none>
kube-proxy-r9pz9 1/1 Running 0 29m <IP> project1kubemaster <none> <none>
kube-proxy-zcrtw 1/1 Running 0 27m <IP> project1kubeworker1 <none> <none>
[root@project1kubemaster ~]# kubectl exec -it kube-proxy-r9pz9 -n kube-system -- /bin/sh
#
#
# find / -name config.conf
/var/lib/kube-proxy/..2020_11_02_16_30_32.787002112/config.conf
/var/lib/kube-proxy/config.conf
In short , It seems like kube-proxy binary & config files are inside kube-proxy pod of that node and they are running inside that pod . One reason why it might show up ps -ef output of host can be due to that pod is using Pid Name space of the host . also we can see that parent pid of kube-proxy process is nothing but containerd of that respective container .
[root@project1kubemaster ~]# ps -ef | grep 2046
root 2046 16904 0 11:30 ? 00:00:00 containerd-shim -namespace moby -workdir /var/lib/containerd/io.containerd.runtime.v1.linux/moby/c3e9bf6ecdcdd0f56d0c76711cea4cadd023cd6ef82bf8312311248a7b0501a4 -address /run/containerd/containerd.sock -containerd-binary /usr/bin/containerd -runtime-root /var/run/docker/runtime-runc
root 2103 2046 0 11:30 ? 00:00:00 /usr/local/bin/kube-proxy --config=/var/lib/kube-proxy/config.conf --hostname-override=project1kubemaster
/var/lib/kubelet/kubeconfig
where a valid configuration is available. – Evaporation